Linesman

I rushed through the crowded roads. It was raining, and Chennai in rains has the worst of the traffic. The bus was at 10 and it was 9.30 already. ‘Not a bad bus to miss’, I said to myself as I navigated through the sea of vehicles. Finally I reached the parking lot and left the bike there rushing to catch my bus. Finally I made it to the bus at 10.15, the bus showing no signs of motion.

I stepped into the bus, hoping that seat number 21A would be occupied by some hot chic. I took my seat, 21B. There was no one in the adjacent seat. I would have settled for that. It would have given me a bit more space to get through the trip. But just as the thought was leaving my brain, a gentleman came in and occupied the seat next to me. He looked calm and composed. “Would you mind if I take the window seat?”I asked the gentleman who agreed immediately without even smirking. Finally I settled down into my window seat.

After a while the clouds started clearing away. The sun was beating down on my face and I could feel a sense of relief. Away from Chitra, away from Chintu, all by himself. I was excited about taking a trip alone. I had always wanted to do that. But a married man seldom gets a chance to take a leisure trip alone. Even if it were for a day, I thought the outing would inspire me to take up more such trips and more importantly make me believe that I can take a trip all alone and not bore myself to death. I knew it could be bit of a challenge. Especially given the fact that I loved to talk.

“So, you going to visit the temple?” I inquired to the gentleman sitting next to me. He looked to be in his forties and was in his pale green shirt and black trousers. I could imagine him to be one of those white color workers sitting in a cramped insurance office building doing a 9-5 job.

“Ya. Been long pending - the visit”, said the man.

“Jeevan. Hello”, I said.

“I am Sheshadri”, the gentleman said.

“I am going there to click some pictures. Wanted to explore this new camera that I had got”, I said

“Oh. Great. It’s always nice to have a hobby”, said Sheshadri as he opened the newspaper that he had brought with himself.

I felt a bit stupid when he said that. Honestly, I had no clue how to use it. I desperately wanted a hobby. Everyone around me had one. In fact some had much more than one. Music, Photography, Trekking – I could take to none of those. Of course, I heard a song here and there in the radio, but nothing beyond that. I realized I don’t have a hobby. I mean NONE. I did watch TV and was used to going to the movies. But those are hardly hobbies anymore. Those are routine. Buying a SLR camera was an attempt to ‘create’ a hobby. That tactic seldom works, I guess.

“I don’t pray that much these days. I would rather appreciate the art in the temples than the God”, I told Sheshadri.

“Well, for each, his own”, he said.

“Anyways, I don’t want to get into the GOD conundrum now. Have enough of it at home with my wife. It’s tough to keep her away from the fasting and poojas, you know”, Sheshadri listened patiently to my rant.

I gathered that I was forcing myself into the conversation a bit too much. And I resisted asking the next question. As the bus was screaming through the highway I sat thinking about life and within minutes I snored off. I was woken up by a sudden jolt and the murmur in the bus went heavy. The tire had burst and the frustration level in the bus was starting to grow. I stepped out of the bus for a smoke. I stood there looking at the endless road. I always loved the highways. May be I should have taken a road trip, I thought. As I stood there gazing at the sand kissing the newly tarred roads, I noticed Sheshadri walking towards my direction. Before long we were chit chatting about the big nothings.

“I so needed the break”, I exclaimed, “I mean, I cannot complain much about my life. I have a decent job and a nice family. But then it all becomes mundane. We become like those fishes in a tank”.

“That’s true. But then we have to find our own way of getting a tour outside the tank”, said Sheshadri.

“I need the tank to burst. That’s what I need”.

“You seem to be stressed. Good that you took the break”, replied Sheshadri as he walked towards the middle of the highway”.

“Oh ya! I mean, I love my kid. No question. But then, simply put, he’s a pain in the ass. Got to keep watching him as he runs around. Stresses the hell out of me”, I replied.

“Ya. They tend to have that effect on you. How old is he?”, asked Sheshadri.

“He will be 6 this year. He is a good kid. But the questions! Oh my God, the questions! They never stop. That put along with the concerns of my wife dearest. I tell you. Men are under rated”, I said while taking the camera out to see if I can get some good shots of the highway.

“I know what you are talking about”, replied Sheshadri smiling in acknowledgement.

“You have kids?”

“Ya. Two in fact”, said Sheshadri.

“Oh boy. That’s double the trouble. You need the break more than I do”

“Not really. I have gotten used to it by now. Once you know that your life is going to be in a certain fashion for a period of time, you tune yourself to accept it. Acceptance is the key”, said Sheshadri.

I was going to dwell more into it but Sheshadri excused himself and started making a call. All the passengers were wandering near about the bus and I stood there wondering what to do. I kept telling myself that I am doing the right thing by taking the trip alone and promised myself that I wouldn't get bored. I tried to imagine standing under the sun, near a broken down bus along with Chitra and Chintu. That gave me some relief. I was sure Chintu would have had at least a thousand questions regarding how the bus tyre had burst. And Chitra would have blamed me for choosing this bus. I felt a bit better after those thoughts entered my brain. I took out my camera and tried to figure things out in it. In a matter of minutes I shut it up and went back to my seat.

When Sheshadri returned, I re-started the conversation with him. We spoke about how difficult it gets to handle kids among other things. Sheshadri briefly touched upon Philosophy but then that did not last for long. Those things are better off discussed under the influence of alcohol, I told him and he agreed with a smile.

I reached the town and checked into the hotel and got freshened up. The daylight had faded already. Once I had settled in, like any good man would do, I checked with the hotel people for the nearest bar. They suggested a restaurant which would serve liquor. They said that the restaurant would show the cricket match in the lawns too on a big screen. I went and sat inside the restaurant, avoiding the lawns. I was going through the menu, when I noticed a man and a woman sitting at the table at some distance. The man had his back turned to me and I couldn't see his face. I had a feeling that he resembled Sheshadri. And I was not wrong. It was Sheshadri.

I walked up to him and said hello. He was acting all sheepish. He introduced the lady with him as a ‘friend’. That’s some spiritual journey the man is taking, I thought to myself. I told myself not to make any judgment about the man.

“Alright. I thought it was you and I was not mistaken. Thought I would say a ‘Hi’. Will leave you guys alone. Have a good dinner”, I said and in the process I scanned her completely. There were no signs of her being married. She looked to be in her thirties. I sensed a flavor of Kannada in her English. Later in the night I saw them checking in to the same hotel as mine. They did go in the same room too. I couldn’t wait to tell this story to Chitra and score a few brownie points highlighting how genuine her husband was. The events that followed in my brain was stressful. I had to keep sheshadri out of the picture while I fantasized about her. Also a moral war was going on in my brain debating for and against Sheshadri. And thankfully, the alcohol took over and knocked me over.

I finished the visit to the temple. I took a few snaps, to show Chitra that I had indeed gone to the temple. And more importantly to show that I am enjoying my new ‘hobby’. I should chose a beach or something the next time around, I thought to myself. The return journey was even more boring. There was no Sheshadri either. I reached back Chennai and settled into my cycle of life.

A few months later, I was at the Bangalore railway station to take a take the train to reach back Chennai after a weekend at my In-laws place. Contrary to the women, a guy’s ‘sasural’ is much better. You are fed, asked to take rest, fed again and asked to sleep, again. The only low point was my Father in law asking about my finances. Almost implying that I am good for nothing. I stood there at the station ignoring Chintu’s chatter. 

As the train was about arrive, I noticed a kid, about 8 to 10 years of age, lying on a stretcher on the platform. His mom and sister were by his side. The kid had his legs broken. But that was not the worst part. He was mentally ill too. The kid kept shouting out loud and everyone in the circumference were glued to him. I took a deep breath. Chitra saw it too and was already in tears. As much as I tried, I couldn’t look away. The kid kept shouting, ‘Amma Train Amma Train’, in a loop. The lady called out to her husband who was buying something in the nearby stall. The man turned around and it was a familiar face. It was Sheshadri. He walked towards the kid and gave him some water. The whole family was smiling throughout the scene. They were more normal than anyone else around. He kept patting the kid saying, ‘train train’ too. As the train pulled in, they carried him into the compartment. 

I asked Chitra to board and told her I will join her in a minute. I could see them put the child in one of the berths with much difficulty. But the smiles never faded.‘Acceptance is the key’, kept ringing in my ears. As I looked through the window of the train, I couldn’t hold back the tears. Sheshadri came out to grab his luggage and he noticed me standing there. I guess he gathered how I felt. He smiled at me and said, “Go ahead, don’t miss the train. May be we will meet in another journey”. And he rushed back to his kid. I rushed towards mine.